50 Days Of Dragon Con 2015 – (Day 3) – Leigh’s 1-2-4 Rule (Part 1) – The Unique Geek
These are the Dragon Con Rules – live them, know them, follow them…or else !
Then there are Leigh’s Rules.
Their’s are very important and are official. Mine will keep you alive during Con…and might get you laid. Just sayin’.
ONE (1) shower per day!
This actually means “one full hygiene routine” per day. Yes, shower (or bath – whichever you prefer). With soap and running water. Lather the soap all over your body. RINSE![1] Brush your teeth. Comb your hair. Put on CLEAN underwear, socks, and outer clothes[2]. Take your meds[3]
Now, I shouldn’t have to have this argument with adults but let’s go on and get the “But..” comments out of the way:
- What if I get in the pool?
- You are not a 7 year old so this is not even a reasonable argument. And it’s never a valid argument. Pool does not equal shower/bath. It didn’t work for my 7yo and I promise, it won’t work for you.
- I’m not the one who’s smelly/dirty! It’s all those other people.
- Yeah, no, it is you. Or it could be you. Honestly, who cares? You are in Atlanta, at the high-end of summer. It’s hot. It’s humid. You are around 60,000 of your closest friends. You’re gonna get sweaty. Which equals funky. Shower. Be the person who smells like sunshine and unicorns and rainbows – which, incidentally, is the new name of a shower gel at Bath-o-Rama.
- Um, sorry, but did you say something about getting laid?
- Why yes, yes I did. The chances of you finding a special friend DRAMATICALLY increase when you look good and smell good. Trust me, unless your person has a fetish[4], being clean and hygienic and having on clean underwear increases the potential to get laid, at least, 50%, even if you look like Chris Evans or Scarlett Johannson.[5]
- As a side note, though, No means no and I’m trusting everyone to not be “that guy or that gal” in hopes of getting laid.
- Why yes, yes I did. The chances of you finding a special friend DRAMATICALLY increase when you look good and smell good. Trust me, unless your person has a fetish[4], being clean and hygienic and having on clean underwear increases the potential to get laid, at least, 50%, even if you look like Chris Evans or Scarlett Johannson.[5]
Also, as a part of standard hygiene, you must wash your hands often and well. Of course, after each bathroom trip but also just for the heck of it. Clean hands = less germs. Less germs = less illness. Amazing but true.
So, you get Rule 1, correct? Hygiene. It’s not just for genies anymore.
[2] Yes, you must wear outer clothes at DC. Yes, even at DC after Dark. The definition of “outer clothes” changes after 10pm but the Atlanta Police Department rules on covering up naughty bits are still in effect. Plus, you likely have money either for booze or bail. Make the right choice.
[3] Your meds. Not your friends’ meds. Not some of your meds. Not the meds of the guy you met at the rave last night. Repeat – YOUR. MEDS. No sharing. No skipping.
[4] And that’s a different con in Atlanta. Happens around Easter. Use your google-fu.
[5] Who are not my favorite or my sexiest Avengers. Know who it is? Tell me and you get a sticker.
—Leigh (Twitter – Need Coffee)
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